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Linus Hates Me
...because I can.

In the interest of equal opportunity, I bring you the Razzie noms as well:

Tuesday, January 25, 2005
The Razzie Noms

Sadly, I've SEEN some of these suckers (and I'm not happy about it...ok, just a little). So I thought I'd comment where I could.

WORST PICTURE

ALEXANDER - Seriously, did anyone buy for a second that Colin Ferrell would be capable of conquering Persia? I did buy the part where he drank himself to death and screwed a lot though.

WORST ACTOR

Colin Farrell / ALEXANDER - See above

WORST ACTRESS

Hilary Duff / CINDERELLA STORY, Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen / NEW YORK MINUTE - Ok, I saw both these movies on Comcast On Demand in the interest of not letting anyone, EVER, know I saw them, except my friendly neighborhood cable-bill compiler. However, for movies that I got on a Friday night when I had nothing else to do, they didn't cause all my brain cells to fall out the back of my neck. Actually, I watched them both twice because you can do that with On Demand.****

****I was also too cheap to get another movie when I couldn't fall asleep.


WORST SCREEN COUPLE


Halle Berry & EITHER Benjamin Bratt OR Sharon Stone / CATWOMAN - Benjamin Bratt scares the crap out of me.

Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen / NEW YORK MINUTE - See above


WORST DIRECTOR
Oliver Stone / ALEXANDER - So I took a class with him in college and he gave me a B+. I still hate most of his movies.

Special “Worst of Our First 25 Years” Awards


WORST ‘DRAMA’ of Our First 25 YEARS


BATTLEFIELD EARTH (2000) - Um, gang, this is the worst MOVIE in 25 years. Worse that Gigli. I saw it because I thought the reviews were so bad it would be funny. It wasn't.

WORST ‘COMEDY’ of Our First 25 YEARS

GIGLI (2003) - see above

WORST ‘MUSICAL’ of Our First 25 YEARS
SPICE WORLD (1998) - I saw it, I watched it. I owned a Spice Girls book, several outfits and dyed my hair like Ginger Spice. So sue me.

XANADU (1980) - Xandu may suck, but it sucks with Oliva Newton John. That's a special kind of suck.

7:05 AM :: ::
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